Of evolving and forgiveness
People who know me usually find it hard to believe, but I was once a very rigid person
Clear cut persuasions, with little room for manoeuvering
How that rigidity changed into flexibility and an astute willingness to entertain broader, and contrary opinions even, is a story for another day.
But every now and then, I am confronted with the consequences of this evolution and how it has influenced my perception of things, people and scenarios.
A first century Christian leader writes to a first century Christian congregation
“Forgive, as Christ has forgiven you.”
I stumble on this extract from the centuries old letter, and I am reminded of how much my perception and outlook on things have changed since the evolution began.
Old, rigid me would have interpreted this quote to mean solely (and as a matter of fact, this is how most people interpret it to mean), “God forgave you, so you have to forgive every other person who has hurt you”. And quite frankly, I do not think there is anything wrong with reading it to mean this.
But that thing with evolving and consequences
Today, I read it to mean, “God forgave you, so you can forgive yourself”
Some people gloss over it but sometimes, the hardest wounds to heal are usually self-inflicted. The whole world can hate you and tomorrow would meet you relentlessly trudging along, but self-hate and guilt are a burden that nobody can really bear without buckling under its weight.
And believe me, I know
I know what it’s like to not be able to look in the mirror because you’re afraid of what you will find there
I know what it is like to let others off so easily, then take the hook, and pierce it deep down inside your throat
So yes, evolution is not always a bad thing
God has forgiven you,
Forgive yourself
